My Patrick

When he was born I cried. I cried because he was my second and I feared that I could never love another as I loved my Madison.
I was wrong.
I cried when Patrick was four months old and I found myself pregnant with Carter. I feared that I did not have enough of "me" left to do it again.
I was wrong.
As if Patrick knew that he would not be the baby for long, he matured. It is hard for me to even think back on Patrick as a baby. Before he was barely a year old, he was talking to us all. By the time Carter arrived, Patrick was "big brother material." He has filled those shoes well.
His heart is big.
It is easily broken.
Carter has been good for Patrick. He brings out the rough little boy in Patrick that sometimes hides behind his need to think...to understand...to figure out.
Patrick gives himself fully to the things and the people that he loves. He is not ashamed of affection, though he does not give it freely.
When he gives it, it is sincere.
He is trusting.
He is forgiving when that trust is abused.
Patrick believes in dreams. He dreams big. To him, anything is possible for him if he wants it bad enough. It is still hard to figure out the things that he wants and why he wants them. He is not driven by the things that a lot of little boys are driven by. This is okay. More important, Patrick is okay with it.
I appreciate Patrick because of who he is. I learn from him. I try to teach him and find myself learning. His emotions run so deep, yet can be brought to the surface in an instant. He is passionate. He is strong.
I pray that Patrick will always be surrounded by people who love him. I pray that they will never fail to show him this love, to reassure him and appreciate him. Sometimes I feel that, in him, I have been given a responsibility that is bigger than I am capable of. Now, I have been given the opportunity to give Patrick the one thing that he loves the most...knowledge. I am so thankful that God has given me the privledge of teaching Patrick, and I pray that I will live up to this responsibility in a way that Patrick will one day be able to look back and be proud of.