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Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Guilt

It is the dark presence that hangs over a person, stealing joy...telling its victim that she is never good enough.
While those who do not try have more reason to experience it, it is to those who try too much that guilt is attracted. It seeks out those who set their expectations for themselves so high that no amount of success can fill the void.....guilt creeps in. Success in one area is smothered by things left undone...loved ones disappointed...expectations hanging in the air like thick smoke, guilt feeding them like oxygen to a hungry fire. A mind full of intention leads to a heart squeezed tight and lungs that find it difficult to take in a good, clean breath of air. Nothing feels clean when stained with guilt.
How does a person fight guilt when she has already given so much of herself? To give more would breed resentment, another sustenance for guilt to feed upon.
Does a person lower her expectations? Will the guilt grow more freely where there is disappointment in goals unreached, or will it thrive better when a person does not even try to pretend that she can do it all? Do others cause guilt to feed upon a person, or does she invite it in herself?
Can a person's everything ever be enough......enough for what? Is she trying to make those around her happy or trying to chase away the ghosts? Does she even know herself?
Guilt
It is the dark presence that hangs over a person...it is her worst enemy...everything will never be enough to appease it. Trying to satisfy it is like adding coal to a fire while trying to extinguish it.

3 Comments:

Blogger Gina Marie said...

I think I've asked myself all those same questions! Have you ever read Laugh Again by Chuck Swindoll? He uses that phrase "stealing joy." Thought you might have found it there.

7:18 PM  
Blogger Sherri said...

Hi Gina,
No, I haven't read it.
You know, guilt is a strange thing because it creeps in unexpected and leaves when it feels like it. Sometimes, things happen that I know that I should feel bad about...like getting on to one of the kids about something trivial, and I feel nothing. Then, I can do something as insignificant as skipping a fieldtrip and feel eaten up with guilt. Of course, during that 4-7 days of PMS, EVERYTHING makes me feel guilty.
Anyway, I should get that book!
Thanks for the note!

7:40 PM  
Blogger Irritable Mother said...

Sherri, you're speaking for me here! I believe guilt is a tool our enemy uses to try and tear us down - though I also believe there are good kinds of guilt, which the Spirit can use for good.
At any rate, I'm learning to cling to Jesus more and more. I KNOW I can't do everything, and I NEED Him to live in me and love through me.
As for those PMS days, I HATE THEM!!!!

9:46 AM  

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